Thursday, December 29, 2005

The return

So Brad and I had a great time at my parents. Brad fixed my Dad's computer so it no longer takes 15 minutes to boot up and it now has USB 2 on it so he can properly work his new Ipod. My Dad is now in his happy place. Friday-Sunday was spend with my Mom, my middle brother, and I doing nothing but eating and playing dominoes. Dominoes is a long time family tradition and that usually results in much name calling, accusations of cheating, and remarks about lineage that may not be appropriate coming from your Mother. In other words a great time. Monday my Mom and I went to Sacramento and I tried on my wedding dress. It was perfection, no alterations need to be done other than adding a bustle to fix up the train. It is nice to be a perfect size something I just wish that the perfect size was a few sizes smaller although there is no one to blame but me on that one. After we tried on my dress we went to go see if we could find shoes. I now understand this will be mission impossible so more time will have to be spent shoe shopping. I know a terrible thing to tell a woman she has to do. We then left Sacramento and headed back towards my parents house. We decided to stop at the Vacaville Outlets to see if they might have shoes, they didn't, so much time was spent walking from store to store. It was surprisingly empty for the day after Christmas. We left the outlets and went back home. Brad was hungry so we went and got my favorite thing Round Table Pizza, yummy. On Tuesday my mom and I headed downtown and went to see if Claires had the things to go in my hair for the wedding, they didn't so we went to Mervyns to get my Mom bras and tennis shoes. I got to spend a couple of minutes talking to my best friend while we were at Mervyn's because she is a manager there and was on her lunch break. We left and came back home and began to pack up the car. We used all available space in the MINI but still had room for us so I guess we were successful. We loaded up and pulled out at 2 and arrived home here at 9:30. All in all not that bad of a commute.

I will take a moment however to gripe about one thing that still has me ticked off. My oldest brother is an asshole. There is really no other way to describe it than that. My parents are very generous when it comes to birthdays and Christmas and so they always give each of us a sizable check. While my parents don't really expect anything in return for their generosity a simple card or phone call on Christmas would be appreciated. The asshole and his worthless wife and 4 children didn't even call and say thankyou. I am so mad that my own brother could be such a selfish jerk I really want to punch him in the mouth. It is things like this that make me realize why my other brother and I consider each other our only siblings. I hate that he can still hurt my Mom, I had hoped that after 20 years of him running away that he would grow up and stop hurting her but I guess that isn't going to happen. So as far as I am concerned from here on out older brother you are no brother of mine. I will allow you to be a cousin that is still invited to family functions but that I don't have to deal with but you and your are no longer part of me and mine.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Happy Holidays

Well in just 2 short hours Brad and I are headed North to see my family. We hope you all have the happiest of holidays, Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanza, Festivas, whatever. I will be back Monday night with stories of my adventure. I may even bore you with more news on my dress, we shall see. Anyway here is a picture of one of the ginger bread houses I made last year. It isn't the niceset thing I ever made but I only had two hours to make the whole thing. I made all of this except the coconut lawn as I am allergic to cocnut I had someone else do that part. Anyway happy holidays one and all! Posted by Picasa

Wednesday, December 21, 2005


Bet you are hungry now. Yes the basket is made of chololate. Yes I made the basket and the strawberries in it. I am posting this because I am trying out Picasso a new way to do pictures and it has a button that you hit that says blog this. How cool is that. We took this to a party and it was a big hit. Soimeday I will make another one. Anyway enjoy. Posted by Picasa

10 very random things about me

Ok I have seen this on lots of other peoples blogs and while I wasn't tagged it still seemed like fun.

1. When I was in the ladder part of the Barbie years, Barbie ran a whore house and Ken was both a pimp and a John.

2. When I went away to college for the first time on the 450 mile trip I had 2 tires blow out and they were only 12 day old tires.

3. On the first day of Kindergarten the teacher asked if anyone wanted to be called something other than their first name, I raised my hand and said I wanted to be called Shelly. She asked me how to spell it and I didn't know so she wouldn't let me be called that. I didn't know how to spell Karin either but she didn't ask that. She called my Mom and to this day my Mom still laughs at this story.

4. I used to get mad at my older brothers and since they could and would beat me up, I would secretly steal their toys and bury them in the backyard.

5. In 5th grade we had to learn square dancing and I had 3 boys fighting to be my partner.

6. In college a group of us would walk to Circle K at night to get slurpies and what not. One night we had a guy that was visiting the school who I thought was very hot. I was trying so hard to be cool that I wasn't watching where I was going and walk right into a fire hydrant. From then on every night we walked by it everyone jumped in front of it and told me to watch out. Needless to say I never saw the hot guy again.

7. My favorite things about myself are my hair and my eyes, yet neither one of these features ever photograghs very well.

8. I was the tetherball champion of the school. No one could beat me.

9. In highschool I was in a play that wanted me to have very exaggerated breasts so I stuffed them with a pillow. All the guys in the play would come and tweak the pillow as a joke. Well I am naturally very well endowed and one rehearsal I wasn't wearing the pillow and one of the guys tweaked my real breast not realizing until too late I wasn't stuffed.

10. At the drama club pot luck dinner I caught my friendship bracelet on fire while trying to light a candle inducting me into the Thespian Society. The teacher put the fire out and I turned to her and said "See I told you I was having a bad week."

Ok that is it 10 really random things about me you really never wanted to know.

Monday, December 19, 2005


Just found out my wedding dress is in. I get to go try it on next Monday while I am home seeing the parents. I am beyond excited!

Magic Mountain

Brad and I have season passes to Six Flags Magic Mountain. I am a rollercoaster junkie so it is nice having the best rollercoasters in the country about an hour away. Brad and I didn't have any solid plans this weekend so off we went to Magi Mountain. The park was practically empty so we got right on to all the rides. Brad really wanted to go on Superman so we had to go all the way around the park up the steep way to the ride because all other routes were closed for the construction of the new coaster. So then we finally got to the ride and waited in the longest line of the day. We finally got on the ride and buckled in. Whoosh we were off, up we went and then down we came. We hurdled backward towards the start thinking our ride was about to end. But alas this was not the case we didn't make it back to the beginning and we began to roll back towards the ramp. The teenagers behind us were getting scared and so Brad decided to do all that was in his power to make it worse for them. We stopped just shy of the ramp and just sat there. Nobody came for us and nothing was said over the speaker. So we just sat there. After about 10 minutes they began to slowly crank us back to the beginning. We got off the ride and went on with the rest of our day. Really not that big of a deal when you think about it. However there was one thing about the situation that bothered me. As we rolled back towards the ramp, we all knew something was not right. The teen behind we yelled out "This is so Jewish" What exactly does that mean? I am very familiar with all the Jewish stereotypes and breaking down is just not one of them. I couldn't help myself so I said back to the little twit, "That is really offensive." Oh I forgot to mention that as we boarded the right one of the teens said something like wouldn't it be cool if Hitler were here? So the second comment was just a little more than I wanted from the little Nazi behind me. So I suppose my lingering thought is what are these kids being taught?

We ended our day at the park with the coolest rollercoaster ever called X. The seats on X rotate with the coaster so that you get the most out of the ride. It is the only coaster out that still makes me scream and laugh at the same time. (apparently it is really something to be heard). If you are a coaster junkie like me I really recommend you try it sometime. If you decide to go to Magic Mountain I will caution you about one thing, do not ride X first. We learned the hard way after you ride X on any given day the other coasters at the park seem boring.

On Sunday we went to Torah study and then out to lunch at Third Street Promenade. We walked around a bit and laughed at street performers. We left there and went to get stuff to make holiday baskets for my clients and some friends and family. I will be baking for the rest of the day today so we can send out the baskets tomorrow. Once we got home it was all hands on deck to get our save the date cards out. I entered all the addresses on my end to then went upstairs to Brad's office and helped pick out the pictures that would go on the card. We looked through 5 1/2 years of pictures and finally found one that we liked and thought was ok for the cards. Does any one else find it sad that we had that much trouble picking a decent picture of us? Well we got the card all designed and loaded with the company online and so they should be printed and mailed out today. I hope so anyway cause then at least it is one thing I know is done and over with. Only about a billion things left to do. Oh well in a few months it will all be over and it will have been worth it. Talk to you later.

Friday, December 16, 2005

The necks just get redder

So I got a call from my mom today and yet again my brother's family has out did themselves in the level of trailer trash ness. My nephew dropped out of school after having failed 8th grade twice. My oldest niece, who has a baby, just dropped out of high school. My youngest niece has now been pulled out of school and will now be "home Schooled" If you have met my sister in law you will know how scary of a proposition this is. The reality of this situation is that none of these kids will ever be able to do anything with their lives. It really saddens me that the expectations for these kids is so low. On the plus side when Brad and I have kids they have a long way to fall to be the family disappointment. I feel embarrassed that this is my family.

Kong was an ok movie. It would have been a great movie if someone had told Peter Jackson that he needed to do some more editing. There was a lot of stuff in the movie that just didn't need to be there or didn't need to be as long. The cool thing about this movie was that we watched it with the guy that plays Lex Luther on Smallville. He looks exactly the same in person except he looks nice and not like an evil genius. Brad was very excited when we were standing behind him at the snackbar. At the end of the movie I saw the name of one of my brother's really good friends in the credits. He used to work for Pixar so I wasn't totally shocked but it is nice to see he is still working and moving up. Brad just thought it was strange when I belted out his name during the credits. Although he had just done it to me with several of his co-workers.

I just talked to the studio I worked with this week and while they will have other smaller things for me before this they want me to put them on the schedule for the entire month of march for catering everyday. I am very excited about this and it is nice to see my little business doing so well. Go me.

I have yet to get any holiday shopping of my own done yet but I got my Mom's done tonight so I guess that is something. I hope that my Dad remembers to take care of my Mom as well. Brad is off tonight with the guys and I am on standby in case ride homes are needed. Man am I a good fiancee or what. Of course he invited me to go but honestly hanging out with his coworkers talking about the latest computer innovation while they all drink and I stay sober to drive just doesn't sound fun. I will stay home watch tv and pick you up when you are done. Then you don't have to keep asking me if I am having fun. Home with the cat's is more my kind of fun honey, sorry. That's it for now we will see if anything exciting happens this weekend.

Thursday, December 15, 2005


So I woke up very early with something I just had to blog about when got up. I went back to sleep and have now completely forgotten what I was going to blog. Rest assured it was a great story that would have knocked you out of your chair because you were laughing so hard. But since I have developed blognesia you will just have to imagine what it was.

On Saturday night Brad and I went to see Rent. It was awesome and I had to go out and buy the sound track immediately. One song gave me chills while I watched him sing it. Tonight we are going to go see Kong, I shall report tomorrow on what I thought of it.

Words can not even begin to express how fulfilling this week has been for me. I love being able to provide meals for companies and here for days afterward how great everything was. Everything went over very well and everyone ate way to much food. The pulled pork alone I made 7 pounds for 11 people and came home with about half a pound of meat. The more I do this the more I know that this is the right direction for me to go and that I don't want to go back to being someone's pastry assistant. I love that I get to make hot food as well as desserts. I love that the menu is my choosing and at the end of the day the success or failure is all mine.

Something happened the other day that really pissed me off and I am not sure if it should have or not. Over the summer I got the place I was working for to cater for Brad's work twice a week. They did the dinners until the movie ended and then Brad's worked hasn't needed meals provided since then. The owner of the company I worked for never really paid me for bringing the contract in and basically screwed me over yet again in that regard. Well the other day she had the nerve to send Brad's company a Ginger Bread House in hopes to get them to order from her again. Brad has talked to the guy who is in charge of ordering meals and told him the situation between me and the company I used to work for and they have agreed to not use them ever again. They also said that in the future if they are ordering again that they would give me a chance at it. All this is great and I am glad in that since that she did what she did because it closed the door for her and opened it for me. The thing is I am pissed that she would have the nerve after all she did to me to go after my fiancee's place of business. I really want to call there and be like "nice try but it isn't going to work." But I know it is better for me to just keep my mouth shut. So anyway it still urks me that she would do that, but since I have seen an overwhelming lack of character in her I am really not surprised. I am waiting for the day though that her charma smacks her in the ass. If I hear about it I will laugh my butt off.

Sunday, December 11, 2005


It has been a long day and I will blog more about it later this week. Right now I am waiting for the pork shoulder I just smoked to cool so I can pull it and go to bed. I am catering tomorrow and doing data entry so I don't think I will have much time to blog. I am still trying to figure out exactly what I will be making for Tuesday and Wednesday. I hope that by Wednesday afternoon things will calm down and I can write all the things that my brain is overflowing with.

I don't know if this happens to other people but quite frankly it usually startles me when it happens. Sometimes I can look at someone and know that something is going to go wrong. It is never very specific but just a feeling like they should use some extra caution. Today I had one of those feelings. At a group event that I will explain more about in the future, I saw a friend that is part of an older generation. As she was walking up towards us I said to Brad and a friend at the table that she didn't look very good. 45 seconds later she bent to pet a dog and fell over onto her face. She was hurt and couldn't get up and we had to call an ambulance to come get her. I still don't know the status of what happened at the hospital so I can't explain more. Brad came back to the table after she was taken away and said "wow honey, you called it. Please always tell me I look good." I wouldn't be troubled about this except that I do get the eerie feeling from time to time and when it is like this I always end up being right. I know that some of you think that it might be cool, or like Medium, but let me assure you it is core shaking. So please if you are reading this and have had similar experiences let me know so I don't feel so weird.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Me in Vegas

The first picture is a picture of the Demon child that kep me up all night last night.

The second is a picture of me taken in Vegas. Really I am just trying to figure out how to work the pictures. Hope you all enjoy me!

sleep deprivation

This is for my furry alarm clock: Hello it is Saturday the day that the humans in the house like to stay in bed together and get some much needed rest. Yes I know that you love me and would dearly love some attention and scratches behind your cute little ears. But for crying out loud it is 4:30 in the morning, I am too sleepy to love you right now, instead your actions make me want to hurtle you across the room. Of course I contained my anger at you this morning which was hard since you didn't get the message that I was not going to get up and pet you until 6:30. I will not however be so nice the next time you decide it is your job to keep me awake, you see in the bathroom that you love so much there is a large container that has water in it. Your Dad and I call it a toilet, anyway if you continue with this behavior you will be dropped in it and I will flush it giving you a swirly but not flushing you down. This will result in you being very wet and me laughing my butt off at you. Now remember you are a cat and water is your arch enemy. So my darling Z you are warned.

Those few of you that actually read this blog will notice that I change the template on my blog. I also added links to some other peoples blogs. I would like you all to know that I figured this out all on my own with no help from Brad. I was quite proud of this little accomplishment so I hope you all like being linked. Today we are going to make a trip to Costco. I have a love hate relationship with them. I love the store and especially their meat but hate all the other people that shop there. Let me let you in on a little secret: the aisles of Costco are to walk through and to pick out what you need, it is not the place to schedule your family reunion. I know the free appetizer made you think it was cocktail hour but really folks move out of the way I have shopping to do. Personally I hate the free samples it clogs up the very aisles I need things from to run my little business. The sample aren't very good, have a lot of calories, and are rarely actually ready to be consumed when you walk by, causing a big group of people to wait in line for something they wouldn't eat if they saw it being offered at a party. Just stop it people and go outside and get a hotdog and a coke for $1.50 you will be much happier with your choice. Anyway despite my little rant I am still happy to be going to Costco and happier still that Brad will be going with me.

Friday, December 09, 2005

Dental Woes

Well after a very long break from seeing the dentist I went a couple of weeks ago. Well the next day I was sent to have my Wisdom teeth pulled, that was the Thursday before Thanksgiving. The next day my parents were down to have an early thanksgiving with my brother and Brad and I. So the day after having teeth pulled I was in Pasadena shopping and cooking for Thanksgiving. We had Thanksgiving on Saturday and Sunday and I was able to eat which was a good thing. We then went on Tuesday To Philadelphia where on the flight we lost 3 hours and 50 degrees. Boy am I a spoiled Californian. We spent the rest of the week with Brad's family and had a very lovely 2nd Thanksgiving. We flew back on Sunday. On Monday I had to go to the dentist that pulled my teeth for a follow up, everything was fine so I was sent on my way. On Tuesday I had a root canal on my left fang tooth. It was very minor and so I wasn't that upset by it. A week went by and this Wednesday I had another and last root canal on tooth number 3. It was a very bad cavity and so the root canal was pretty involved. I thought everything was fine but I guess not because yesterday as I was eating goldfish crackers on the other side of my mouth stupid tooth 3 broke. Crap so I called the dentist and was told to come right in and I had to have the same tooth redrilled and built up. It feels weird. Basically these are the things I was afraid of that kept me from the dentist in the first place. Oh well I suppose I did this to myself.

Things are going a little slow right now. This is for many reasons including spending my life in the dentist's office right now. However I did data entry for a studio today and they want me Monday through Wednesday next week to do data entry and breakfast and lunch. I am so glad to be getting some money in in time for the holidays, maybe people will get presents afterall. Well at the very least I know the dentist's family and friends are getting good presents on me this year. Brad and I have decided that we will raise our future demons to be Dentists. Then they can make lots of money and take care of us in our old age. Well that is about it for now.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

$100 Burger

So a lot has been happening over the past couple of weeks and I wasn't quite ready to blog about it until now. I lost my crappy job with the horrible caterer I used to work for because I was given a raise in words but never in practice. The owner didn't even have the guts to tell me that she wasn't going to give me the raise after all she waited until I saw it on my pay stub and went back and asked for it. I later decided that I could not go in to work again until I was given the money I was promised and I was working for the wage we had agreed upon. She then said I had a bad attitude and they would find someone else. Actually she didn't say that to me she that to my boss. So I found myself unemployed. Brad and I talked about it and we decided I would not be going back to work for someone else and instead I would start my own catering business. It is going well so far. Last week I made dinner for 50 people and a lunch for 57 people. This week I haven't had anything booked but it has given me time to figure out menus and what direction I want to go. All in all I am very excited about this new opportunity.

Now about the title of this post. Since I am now home during the day I am available for things I wouldn't otherwise be. Today Brad called and asked if I would like to go flying with a coworker of his. So I met up with Brad and the coworker at the Santa Monica airport where a Cessna was rented and we flew to Catalina and had Buffalo Burgers and then flew back. It was very cool and I am so glad I got a chance to do it. I actually liked flying in a Cessna better than in a regular jet plane. Perhaps I am crazy. So don't be surprised if before too long Brad or I are taking flight lessons. We will see. But for the record $100 burgers are very tasty. (the burgers aren't that expensive the renting the airplane is)

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Trials and tribulations

Well all in all yesterday was a pretty crappy day. I got paid on Friday but as I have direct deposit and the pay stubs hadn't come in by the time I left work I didn't worry to much about it. When I looked at the amount that had been deposited on my bank statement it was about $100 less than I thought it should be but I assumed it was an honest mistake and when I picked up the breakdown I would know where the problem was. I didn't work on Monday so I waited and got it yesterday while I was already at work. Usually when you don't pick up your check on Friday it is in an envelope newt to the time clock, but they weren't there so I asked the owner for it as I was leaving. She gave me the envelope and told me to have a good day and I left her office and went back to the chef office to clock out. I opened the print out and saw that not only was my overtime not paid but also the raise I was told I was given over a month ago was not on my paycheck. SO I went back to the owner's office to ask about it and as I walked through her door she said that she had just told my boss and she guessed she would tell me now that she could not do the raise she already told me she had given me because she couldn't afford it right now. I was shocked and angry and on the verge of tears, so I snapped back well then where is my overtime. She had the nerve to say what overtime? I had worked a seven day week on that time card and I wanted my money. I got the money for the overtime from her, and I explained that it wasn't right of her to know she hadn't given me the raise and not say anything because I had spend money over the weekend assuming I had it to spend but apparently I didn't and now I don't have enough money to cover my expenses. Her response was that she would try to make it up to me on the next check. I left the office and went home not saying all the things I wanted to say and not sure what I should do. I felt as if I went back to work today I would be saying that what she did was ok. However if I quit I wouldn't have a job at all and that would be irresponsible. I thought about it and thought about it. Brad suggested that I not quit but tell them that I would not return to work until the money I was promised was returned to mew and that I was working for the wage that had been agreed to. So I didn't work today and I don't know if I even have a job right now but the good news is that I didn't quit and if she doesn't pay me and I don't have a job I can file for unemployment immediately. So I guess that is something. All in all I am upset and scared but only time will tell how this pans out. The other good news is that my boss feels I am doing the right thing and he is actively going after the owner to give me my do. If I don't return it will cost her more to replace me than it would to just pay me in the first place because it would take two people to replace me. All this makes me fell good but I still have a lot to figure out.

Monday, October 10, 2005

Greenday, new finds, and other current events

This weekend Brad and I had tickets to see Greenday both Saturday and Sunday night. We had a great time both nights and on Sunday we were so close to the stage in the pit we got sweat on. I did learn something both nights about people. It seems to me that alcohol isn't always a good idea in having a good time. Night one the lady in front of us was so drunk she couldn't stand anymore and we seriously worried about the poor chap in front of her that seem like he might get more than he bargain for at the event. Night two a woman was so drunk during Greenday's first song she started causing trouble and security had to escort her from the concert thus making her miss the whole thing. Both of these people not only ruined the event for themselves but also for those around them or with them. It seems to me that I had a great time both nights and no alcohol was needed to enhance my experience. I am not saying this because I am in any way against the consumption of alcohol but more in the fact that it should not be used to ruin a good time.

Brad and I both enjoy an occasional spirit and it has been a source of irritation that we do not have a decent liquor store near us. Today however that was changed. While going through Saturdays mail I came across a pamphlet to a liquor store. It looked large and exactly what we had been looking for. I looked at the address and discovered it was only about a mile and a half from the house. So I went over there to check it out and not only did they have the random Belgium beer Brad likes they had it by the case and a lot cheaper then we had been able to find before. We are very excited to now know of a place to get the more random beverages we have been wanting. So I suppose the lesson here is to actually look at your junk mail it may show you what you have been looking for all along.

I have been sick with a pretty bad cold for the last couple of weeks and it was actually bad enough to trigger my asthma that had been dormant for the last 5 years. I went to the doctor today and she gave me an inhaler and said I should be breathing normally within the week. I welcome the relief as I am really tired of coughing all the time and Brad is tired of me shaking him out of bed with my cough. Well that is about it for now I am sure there is a lot I am forgetting but that does tend to happen.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

ok so I am a slacker

So it has been awhile since I posted and you are probally all wondering if I fell off the face of the earth. Oh right no one is actually reading this. Things are going pretty well right now. Wedding plans are coming together and work is getting busier. We have a big summer planned with lots of houseguests coming and going all the time. It is nice to have a place where our friends and family can come and stay. In sadder news our friends Jaime and Jenny are moving to Arizona this weekend and so we will not see them very often. We are however very happy for them because they were able to buy a house in Arizona and could not here so we wish them luck. Last weekend I cleaned out my office and so it is nice to hang out down here again and I am enjoying having a place to hide in. The cats aren't as happy because I don't let them in here.

It seems in this modern world of computers it is becoming easier and easier to keep in contact with old friends. All it takes is one friend starting a website and other friends posting to it and the next thing you know you are reconnected to the old group and it seems as though you don't miss anything. Sometimes technology is a great thing.

I have now finished and passed my intro to Judaism class and so I have my Beit Din scheduled for September 13th. It will be exciting to have it all done and taken care of and I am excited to make it official. I am a little nervous though so any thoughts on your part on that day will be greatly appreciated.

Saturday, July 16, 2005

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Brad and I went to see the new Wonka movie last night. I had been a little apprehensive of this film due to my great love for the original movie as well as my love for all the Roald Dahl books. The only thing that made me think that this might be a good version was that I really feel that Tim Burton is the only director that could capture the darkness that Dahl writes with and yet keep the comical aspect of the film. The movie started and I was completely moved to the world of Charlie. I fell in love with this movie and I would be willing to go see it again today. The really amazing thing was that I felt my love for this film in no way betrayed my love for the Gene Wilder version. They are two completely different films and I would say Willy Wonka are two different people who happen to share the same name. I do feel that Burton captured more of the essence of Dahl's book and the original is way more light spirited feel good movie. Both movies made me want to live in the chocolate factory especially the edible park but if I had to choose I think I would prefer to live in Burton's factory. The one thing that I wish had happened in either of the two movies but didn't was the fact that it was no fluke that Charlie got the last ticket he was chosen and through a bit of magic he bought the winning bar at a candy store that only existed for him to buy the bar at. It is my favorite part of the book and it saddens me that both directors missed it.

I hope that some day a candy factory makes a candy meadow where people can pay to visit and everything is edible. If it existed now I would have the wedding there next to the chocolate river. I think if anyone ever pulls it off they will make a lot of money.

Thursday, July 07, 2005


I finally got a hold of the registrar for the conversion class Brad and I are taking. Since there are no classes in the near future for me to make up the class I missed I can go and talk to my Rabbi about the subject and have him call saying I know all I need to know about it and it will be made up. That was a huge relief because I would much rather talk to Rabbi Maller and get it over with the have to meet in a strange class and try to learn from a Rabbi I have no history with. Also by getting it from Rabbi Maller I will get good information as well as my questions answered not ignored.

Brad and I have a big weekend planned. On Saturday we have a breakfast with the MINI's and then we head to Pasadena to have a BBQ at my brother's house. On Sunday we have a MINI run and then we are going to a Bridal expo and then we are coming home and having movie night at our house. That is a lot to do in one weekend.

Monday, June 27, 2005

The Great Aunt

So my niece's water broke today so she is in the hospital now and they are inducing labor. So I guess by the end of the day I will be a great aunt. I find the whole thing to be very strange, somehow saying I could be a great aunt also means that I could be a grandmother had I had kids already. This is a very scary thing to me as I don't feel quite ready to have kids yet even now that I have reached my 30's. I was thinking about it though and it is entirely possible that the rash of girls that had babies while we were in high school could now be grandparents. I suppose that there are times in your life where a mirror is held up and you see how your life could have gone if you had made different choices. Sometimes that might be at a high school reunion, or running into a old friend. For the most part when those times have found me, I have been happy with the direction my life has gone. I find it to be a little rewarding that I can look back at the others my life has crossed and feel that I have made good choices and I am not embarrassed by the way my life has shaped up. I guess during those times I should thank those others around me for making different choices than me and showing me where the other path lead. I should say that my sister in law is delighted to be a 33 year old grandmother, so I am happy for her. I am just really glad it is not me. I just appreciate that there are people out there whose lives are very different than yours and they might love them and be glad they are not leading yours, but that you can feel like I am glad I am who I am because you are not leading their life.

Sunday, June 26, 2005

Wedding stuff

So this has been a crazy time. While Brad and I were in Philadelphia I went with two of my attendants and picked out and ordered their dresses for the wedding. We also went and picked out a wedding band for me and started the process of finding one for Brad. This week Brad has been trying to get our website up and running so people will know were to go to ask questions about the wedding. We started a wedding blog so this should be the last blog here on wedding stuff. Today we went and registered at Macy's and at Home Depot, I didn't realize how much work registering was. So now we have a starting point. Other than that the wedding plans are coming along and I am not feeling stress about it yet.

Yesterday we went to Irwinndale Speedway and saw the races. Brad and the other MINIacs got to drive the pace lap while I was in the announce booth being the spokesperson for the club. We had a great time and came back exhausted. Jesse James was racing in the figure 8 race and he puts on a good show. He won the event so that is a real crowd pleaser. It was nice to spend a day with some of our very good friends and I have to say I feel very lucky to be in such a great club.

In other news of late, I realize I never updated this blog about my parents house. After much thought and contemplation my parents have decided not to sell and so for the next 5 years at least I don't have to worry about it. Words can not express what a relief that has been. So the landscaper should be coming out in the next few weeks to completely redo my parents backyard. I am very curious to see how all this turns out as I am having a hard time picturing the yard any way but the way it has always been. I am very excited to see how it will all turn out. So it is getting very late and I should be getting to bed now. Good night

Monday, June 06, 2005

Current Events

Ok so I suppose you all have had enough time to stop laughing at my stupidity from the previous post and so now I can begin to get you caught up on all the small happenings of my life of late. I have decided that it is time for me to seriously look for a new place to work and so I have been scouring job boards and sending out resumes. I interviewed with a new bakery that is about to open and the interview seemed to go well and the job was very promising but after several weeks of the employer milling over his decision he decided to go a different direction. I discovered from this that it is even more frustrating to not get a job when you have the skills and experience in order to perform the job and they still pass on you. On the plus side things are starting to pick up at work and I should be getting more hours. Although that is great I think it is still time for me to see if there is something better out there. Another positive is that Andrew and Debbie really don't want me to leave so when business inproves I can finally go in and demand a decent wage.

Brad and I are doing really well and I think everyday I see something else to love him more for. It is now less than a year until the wedding and since it is no longer May I can now say we are getting married May 21st and lose the 2006. On Saturday it will be exactly 5 years ago that Brad and I meant. My how time flies. We will spend that anniversary in Philadelphia watching Brad's sister graduate from college. We will be coming back to Los Angeles Friday the 17th and I will then wish my Mom a very Happy Birthday. On Saturday the 18th it will be 5 years since Brad and I started dating and we will spend that anniversary all day at a Shabbaton with my conversion class. Then that Sunday the 19th will be Father's Day so it looks like it will be a very busy week.

It seems as though I may be getting a race car of my own soon so Brad will have to begin to eat my dust on the track. I am very excited about this and am looking forward to having a project car of my own to Monkey around with. I will give more details later when the deal is done but it looks as though I will have a fully functional race car with roll cage for under $300. Let's just say Brad is now very scared of me. So to decorate my race car I will be looking for some very large daisy stickers because nothing says race car like flowers. Yes the car will have a name and will be severely abused. So I guess now I really need to find that auto mechanic class I have always wanted to take.

Ok you all have enough info to digest for a little while I wouldn't want you to be overly stimulated by the fact of a post 2 days in a row. We will see if we can throw caution to the wind and post 3 in a row. Wouldn't that be novel.

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Blond Moment

Ok so it has been quite awhile since I have posted and I guess it is time I get back to posting. I decided that I would begin by sharing one of my more brilliant moments of late so you all might at least get a laugh at my expensive. Yesterday Brad and I had a very busy day that consisted of a breakfast at 7:30, a picnic in Santa Barbara area at 11 and then a party at a friends house at 7:30pm. So needless to say there was really no time between events. In the meantime so very good friends of ours were showing their car today at a show and needed the use of our garage so they could wax the car before the show. Since we would be gone all day I thought it would be easier for them if I moved my car out of the garage and into the complex parking so they would have the whole garage to work in. So I moved my car and then Brad pulled out of the garage next to my car so we could go and he closed the garage door. As my purse was still in the garage I jumped out of my car and asked Brad to reopen the garage so I could get my purse. I grabbed my purse and then got into Brad's car. We started to drive out of the complex when I got the feeling I had not locked my car doors, so I made Brad stop and I got out and checked my car and yes indeed the doors were not locked. I locked the doors and we went on our marry way. Several hours later we get a call from our friends that are using our garage apparently I had not only forgotten to lock the doors originally but I had also forgotten to turn off my car from idol and take out my keys. So basically my car sat outside and idled for 9 hours before we got home and I found the spare key to the car. Needless to say I had very little gas left. The good news is my car did not overheat or incur any other problems from my stupidity. Score a few more points to the fine people at Kia your cars do take a beating. So now I suppose I have done one far worse than locking your keys in the car or leaving the lights on. Thankfully we live in a safe area and my car wasn't stolen. Let's hope nothing that stupid happens again. Anyway it is late and I have to work early so I will let that be all for now and I promise to blog more tomorrow about recent events not in the shear stupid column.

Friday, April 29, 2005


I have no reason to really care if it is Friday today or not as this was a very slow week at work and so I actually haven't worked that much. But it seems as though it is still nice that today is Friday so at least I don't have to feel guilty for not working the next two days. The longer I work with my trainer the longer I think I enjoy it. It seems as though not only have I gone down 2 sizes, I am more energetic, more flexible, and stronger. These are all good things. I hope at some point the scale will start to agree that I am indeed losing weight but alas right now the weight is staying the same and the body is changing. Oh well I shouldn't complain as Brad has lost weight but not changed sizes or had any of my other benefits and all things being equal I guess my side is better. I also get something else out of having a trainer twice a week. On Tuesdays and Fridays when she comes I am not as lonely and the day seems to go by faster. I need to figure out how to get some playmates that are home in the middle of the day like I am so that we can hang out together. I have even tried to volunteer at the Temple but thus far all I have gotten in response is that they will definitely call me. Oh well soon Brad will finish this movie and I will not be home by myself as much and it will be better. I have tried to not gripe about how terribly lonely I am since I only see him on Sundays because these hours are tougher on him then they are on me. At some point though I have to vent my frustration somewhere. I hate eating alone especially, for some reason eating alone seems like I am trying to hide that I am eating and it just seems like a social time to me. In any case this was supposed to be the last day of this movie and then I was going to get him back. They extended the deadline another month. Brad was so upset that the movie wasn't over but I feel like there is little I can do to lift his spirits when I was counting down the days as well. The thing that makes his hours so much worse is that my are the extreme opposite. When I do work it is very early in the morning so it is hard to stay up to see him when he comes home. I am then off by 1 or so and then have the rest of the day by myself. Those hours are hard enough but when you add to that the fact that we are so slow that in the past 3 days I have worked a total of 3 and a half hours I feel very guilty for being home while Brad is at work. So I suppose if you run through my emotions lately they have been, lonely, guilty, and grieving. Wow when you look at it that way it is no wonder no one is reading this blog. Well I will do my best to find a happy place tomorrow. Read then and see if I found it.

PS I keep hoping that I will click the spellcheck button and it will tell me I am a genious and everything is spelled correctly, that day hasn't come yet but I hope to find it soon.

Thursday, April 28, 2005

I fought the law

Ok so in truth I was going to send a scathing letter to the City of Los Angeles about my $330 ticket but I had not taken good pictures yet to send the letter off. Today when I got home I checked the mail and saw I had a letter from the city of Los Angeles parking violations bureau. It said the office had discovered that the citation was invalid so therefore no further action or payment by me was necessary. So basically I thought about fighting the law and I won. So anyway apparently random handicapped zones do not appear out of nowhere and disappear before you return to your car. So I suppose it is once again safe to park on the streets of Los Angeles. Ok I have to go get ready for class now. I shall blog more later. In the Mean time YEAH!!!!!!!

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

I am blogging this

I was lacking a creative name for today's post so that is all I came up with sorry. My parents are still meeting with lawyers and appraisers before they make a final decision about their house. My Dad really wants to sell and my Mom really doesn't want to sell. So my Mom is feeling a little sad because she realizes she can't make my Dad not sell and not have him resent her for it later. It is sad really when did we become grownups and have to consider everyone else over our own wants. I really wish they wouldn't sell but I also want them to make the best decision for themselves. I really want to throw myself on the ground and throw a big old tantrum though and say they can't sell.

Brad is still working insane hours. They were suppose to end this week but alas they have extended his deadline until May 20th. I find it a little funny that Brad asked me to marry him and then started working around the clock the next day. He is so burnt out and tired of this movie he was sorry they extended the deadline as well. The thing is that my hours are quite the opposite right now and it would be nice if for once we could meet in the middle. Oh well hopefully this will be over in just a couple more weeks.

We had a very lovely Seder Sunday and it was really nice to enjoy the company of good friends around our table. It has really put a burden on my heart though. I have not been able to stop thinking about Brad and I starting a ministry to the young adults at our synagogue that have no other place to fit in. See as we aren't married yet we can not attend the couple events. As we are not parents we can not attend family events. As we are not students we can not attend student groups. So we have fallen into a whole. It seems to me that there are several other people at the Temple who are in the same boat as we are which is how we made friends with Jamie and Jenny who came to our Seder. The more I think about it the more I realize that if I feel called to do something about it I really need to act upon it. So I am thinking about starting small and just inviting people to come over after Temple Friday night for dessert and coffee and see where it goes from there. I am not sure as this is all very new to me but I think I might talk to the Rabbi about it and see what he might suggest. Well I suppose that this is all I have to say for now. I will talk to you all later.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

The Love Letter

A little while ago I bought the DVD of the movie Jerry Maguire. There is a scene in there where he says you complete me. Shortly after I bought the movie a guest on Oprah was talking about that movie and said that the line gets women in trouble because then they look to a man to feel whole. At first I thought, but Brad does complete me or at least I feel more complete with Brad. I then began to think on the point a little more and I came to the realization that no Brad doesn't complete me because I am fully capable on my own. The answer is that with Brad I can be completely me. I do not have to hold a corner of myself back because he wouldn't understand. Instead if I am silly I can be silly, if I am sad I can be sad, if at any time a wild idea comes into my head I can tell him and we figure out together if it will work. In some ways it feels as if being completely me with someone makes me complete, that may be true but I think the point is that because I can be me I can be complete and that is where the distiction is. It is funny though how easy it is to forget that having someone you can be completely you around is special and unique. Sometimes when you are around someone else and you let a little too much of yourself out you quickly learn it was a mistake and this person can not handle all of you. I suppose the point is that I feel so fortunate that I will get to spend the rest of my life with someone who I can be honest with all of me, and trust them to handle it. It is also nice that he knows all of me and still loves me and will be goofy with me or grief a loss with me without making me feel stupid for taking it as a loss. I love that Brad totally gets my grief over my parents house and feels the loss too. That it isn't just me that is losing a dream but we are losing a dream together. But because we are ourselves with each other somewhere along the way the dreams we each held separately have merged and become our dreams together. This realization makes me even more sure that I am the luckiest woman alive that next Spring I will become his wife and we can begin finding our dreams together.

I know this post was a bit sappy but I thought you all could use it after my current posts. I hope that none of you got too bad of a stomach ache for reading it.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

The Loss of a Dream

So news from parents came today and it is looking very much like they are going to sell their house. Now you may be saying big deal and I can see where you might be coming from but to me this was no ordinary house. Without tying into all the emotional aspects of why this is killing me I will start with this, I have never seen a house or yard that I would rather live in than the house I grew up in. My parents bought the house when I was 4 so I do not remember any house before it with any clarity. Every moment of my growing up was spent in that house and it has become a member of the family. 2.6 acres in Napa California is not something you can just find and when my parents happened upon it I recall them saying it was their dream home. When we moved in my Mother exclaimed that we were home now and she would never move again. I believed her. I never for a minute thought that there would ever be a time when my parents might live somewhere else. I thought that this is where they would die and then I would buy my brothers out and live there with my children. I did realize that the last aspect of that was a dream and would probally not be possible but I had hoped I would have a lot of time to work it out. I plan to get married at this house a year from now and while the sale will not make my parents have to move until after the wedding the reality is that my wedding will be the last memory created at the place where all of them start. In some ways I see it as poetic that it will make the wedding even more of beginning a new life and creating a new place that will be home to Brad and I, but the other part of me is not ready to let go. I suppose what I didn't say is that when my parents move out a bulldozer will come and knock down my parents house and replace the house with a community instead. I will never be able to show my children the house I grew up in nor will they have the pleasure of playing freely in Grandma and Grandpa's big back yard. I also know that I am being silly crying over a piece of land but that home is a piece of me and helped to mold me into who I am. I can not imagine any other place feeling more like home than that one did. There is another side to this I haven't stated yet, I am worried that if my parents sell the house they will have nothing left to do. Their days currently are spent remodeling the house to make it better for them. This is really the only exercise my Father gets and I worry about his health if he doesn't have that anymore. I guess what it all comes down to is that I am scared because I never picture a future without that home being apart of it. So if on my wedding day you see me crying more than the average bride know I am closing a door to much more of my past life than I ever anticipated and it will be a very hard day of letting go.

Thursday, April 14, 2005


Ever have one of those days when you feel like the cosmos is spitting on you. I had been having such a lovely time, a nice three day weekend with Brad and good friends, cool birthday presents, beautiful scenery and things maybe picking up at work. So I suppose as per the law of gravity I had to come down. Yesterday I went out to my car after a long day working and there was a parking ticket on my car. I figured it was because my sticker had been pulled off only a few days before and I had yet to make it to the DMV. So I took the ticket off my window, was a little frustrated and looked at the ticket. It was for $330.00 for parking in a handicap zone. Let me be clear and say I was parked on a city street with no signs limiting parking and the curb was not then nor had it ever been painted blue for handicap. In fact the only blue thing anywhere near the area is for a payphone. So now I get to fight the law. I am going to have to turn into mega photographer taking pictures of the area to prove it wasn't a handicapped spot. So my solution to this problem is screw them I will ride my bike from now on. Let them find a way to give that a parking ticket. All this started because the city is trying to get the homeless out of the area and so they have removed all the parking under the bridge and so there is little to no parking and the parking that is there is being strickly enforced. So I guess a homeless person needed my registration more than I did. At least they didn't break into my car.

So this prompted me to try and get the new printer working because I need to print out some forms to take with me to the dmv. Well it is now 3 hours later and I still don't have the printer working. Oh well it is not my day. If I can not get them to work tonight I will print it from work tomorrow.

On better news we have our intro to Judaism class tonight and I will get to play another round of stomp the Rabbi. I will be accepting questions in the comments that you may have for me to see if I can stomp him again. Last week I asked how you could hire a Temple Goy if the Torah says everyone in your camp including the stranger should rest on the 7 day. He didn't answer me but Rabbi Maller at my temple did. The goy can not be employed they have to volunteer to do those things for you or you are breaking the Sabbath and the practice began when Jews moved into cold climates like Russia because they could not survive the cold from not lighting fires. So feel free to leave your burning question for next weeks episode of Stump the Rabbi.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Cold Dead Body

I don't know if any of you are aware of this because it hasn't gotten much press, but the Pope is dead. While I find it said that the old man has passed and that he was very important to a lot of people, I don't see why every time I turn on the TV or open the internet I have to see pictures of his cold dead body. I know that in the Catholic faith they find it important to view the body of a loved one and since so many people hold a high value on the Pope they have to show pictures of him to those that have to mourn. My question is how does that involve me. I have no desire to see a dead body and am a bit offended that the media is forcing him on me even in commercials. I think they should have a special channel where it is all dead Pope all day long. You could put music to it and treat it like the Yule log they show every year at Christmas. For that matter I nominate the channel that plays the Yule log as the Dead Pope channel. That way only people who want to gaze upon the stiff, cold body can do so whenever they please and I don't have to see it. I have never seen a dead body before and have made the choice not to. I did not see the remains of my Grandparents when they passed and missing that part of the process did not hinder my grieving process. I certainly don't care to see a religious figure I didn't care about or agree with in life dead. So please media take your cold dead body pictures somewhere else.

OK now that I am done with that rant I will move on to other news. I only have one more work day and then I will begin my three day weekend of wine tasting and birthday. I love my birthday. The attention whore in me comes out and I love that everyone stops and acknowledges that a great thing happened to the world 32 years ago.... Karin entered it and the world may never be the same again. (Hee hee hee) Tomorrow will be a very busy day, I have to work in the morning and then Michele comes in the afternoon to abuse me yet again. I swear she keeps getting more and more sadistic in the torture she calls training. Then Tomorrow night I have my very first Intro to Judaism class. 18 weeks and I should be almost converted. The Rabbi already said I will be the teachers star student. I am afraid I will be one of those know it all geeks that the class wants to pummel. I guess we will see.

Today in the mail I got a new toy. I got the Ipod Shuffle Sport Case. So now my Shuffle is in a water proof case so I can still go out and exercise if it is raining. Of course I got this just as it seems the rain is finally gone. Oh well I guess I run a little late some times. Last night Brad got home about the same time as my alarm started to go off to get up. Ah well we will get to see each other this weekend and he is going to go with me to my Intro class. I think he is afraid of me knowing more about being a Jew than him and that is why he is so willing to take this class. We will see if he stays as interested in the class when homework is assigned. To be honest I am not sure how interested I am in homework. I mean how can a assignment show what my faith is. Well rules are rules and I will have to play by them for now.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Pet Peeves

Ok so the other day Brad and I went to the movies. We saw Sin City and I hated it, but that is beside my point here. I find several things at a movie theatre just get on my nerves. The one that really gets me is the sound of people crunching all through the movie. Why in the world did we decide to have the worlds noisiest food as the movie staple. I really don't want to hear you crunching in the middle of the movie I paid to watch. I also hate people who come in late to a movie and then expect other people to change seats to accomendate them. First I got here early and chose the specific seats I did for a reason. Second believe it or not I am watching the previews and to me it is just as much a part of the movie as the movie itself. Third the world doesn't revolve around you so why am I being inconvenienced for your lack of time management. My last big annoyance in the theatre is children in movies they have no business seeing. First a 10 pm show is not for you to have your kids at. That show time is adults only and we don't want to listen to your screaming kids who are up way past their bedtime so they are tired and cranky. Two a rated R film is not for your 5 year old. There is a reason that the films are rated and if you have to bring Billy to the movies take him to a movie that is for him and not for me. Third I am not their parent, if I wanted kids I would have them so don't ask me to parent them for you. You know when they are being rude and distracting, so do something about it, don't make me turn around and tell Billy to please stop kicking my seat and throwing popcorn.

The thing is I really do like going to the movies. There is no better way to see a movie than on the big screen with the sound rumbling your seats. I just don't like other people distracting me from staying in the world of the movie. I don't want to know that I am surrounded by other people watching a movie, I want to be the third person omniscient who is floating above the story being played out. I can see now that this was my problem with Sin City. I could in no way feel apart of the movie being played out. The story didn't make me want to go there with them, so instead my brain focused on the none ceasing sound of crunching coming from the stranger next to me. Next time I hope people will eat dinner before the movie begins.

Sunday, April 03, 2005

Living with the Seven Dwarves

It seems as though lately my darling fiancee has been going through the stages of the dwarves. A few weeks ago he was sneezy, as he was feeling under the weather a bit. He is almost always Doc, as he has an amazing grasp on all sorts of random information. By the time he gets home at night he is usually sleepy. Right now he is trying to change his brakes and I think he is feeling a bit like Dopey, though I don't really think so. I am looking forward to him being Happy, I am hoping next weekend will help out with that. But this weekend he has been Grumpy. He came home yesterday in a grump and today has stayed in it. His brakes on his car aren't helping him out any in improving his mood. On days that he turns into Grumpy Dwarf I find it best to say as little as possible. I know his mood has little to do with me so it is best to not do anything to be the source of his Grumpiness. I actually don't mind Grumpy Dwarf that much, it can actually be funny to watch, but it does make me a little sad that he is so frustrated with things and there is little to nothing I can do to fix it. I know the movie is almost over and when it finally ends I should lose the dwarves and gain my fiancee. Actually though through this whole thing there is a dwarf that is yet to appear. I seriously doubt I will ever see this one manifest though, and he is Bashful. Although the good thing about living with the dwarves is that in Brad's eyes I am Snow White. I suppose there are worse things to be.

Thursday, March 31, 2005


This has been a very long week. My boss is on vacation so that leaves the pastry kitchen all to me. This would not be a big deal because we are slow except that the orders seem to come in at the last second and so I try to find things to do to keep me there in case something comes in. Since I have no clue of what will come when I am playing it by ear a lot. In addition to this I am trying to be very good about doing my exercises. Today I went on an hour and a half bike ride. All I can say now is I am sore. I am however really enjoying my Ipod shuffle and am glad I have it for my daily exercising. I guess I am lucky with the exercise that I can go out and walk or go out and bike ride. I don't think I would be nearly as motivated using stationary equipment. I know of no stationary bike that takes you past fields of wild flowers and then to the ocean but the bike trail next to my house does. Of course a stationary bike doesn't have to fight upwind, but hey mare of a workout for me.

In other news not related to me, Terri Shiavo finally passed away today. I am happy she is finally at peace. I hope someday soon her family will enjoy peace as well. I wonder if her parents felt any sense of relief when she finally passed away. I know when my grandparents were ill it was very sad to see them go but also good that their pain and struggling was over. In any case I hope they now can focus on the love of Terri and not on her time in the vegetative state.

Oh well it is time for me to go to bed. I have to be at work at 4am tomorrow. It is somewhat troubling to know that when I get to work in the morning you guys on the East Coast are still asleep. I am tempted sometimes to call just because you have already slept 3 more hours than me. I suppose that is the stinker in me.

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Unplug Me Please

With all the news of Terri Shiavo I have been thinking of how terrible this whole situation is. Now I don't care what side of the issue you fall upon, I have my very strong opinion and that will not be changing anytime soon. My issue is dignity. I am sorry but the media circus that surrounds this issue is bad enough, some might even say distasteful, but to have your final days be spent with so much arguing has got to be terrible. What I wish for Terri is for her to rest in PEACE. There is little I can think of that would be worse than my family and Brad publicly fighting and ruining each other lives over me. So I would like to make it clear here and now I do not wish to be a stuffed animal on a bed. If all measures have been taken to make me better and have failed unplug me. I do not want a respirator, a feeding tube (Life without chocolate?). Some argue her brain is still working and she is still under all of this but unable to respond. This to me is way worse than if she wasn't alert. My brain being a prisoner to a body that can do nothing to respond, no thank you. Ears to hear what everyone is saying but the inability to communicate back. So I have a plan if my wishes are not heeded, I will obviously still die before you do and I will haunt you like there is no tomorrow. Every step you take I will be there making you live through a hell as you forced me to.

I guess the hardest thing for me in this whole mess is the relationship between Mike Shiavo and Terri's parents. I guess I really don't believe Mike is a bad guy. I think he honestly wants what is best for Terri as well as he would really like to move on. The thing about all this is when Terri is finally gone at some point they are going to realize how hurtful all this ones to everyone involved and maybe once they step outside of the situation they will see each others points. By then though it will be too late, actually it is already too late now. All of the mud slinging that has been done in the press can never be undone. Things that have happened can not unhappen. In the end these people have torn each other into little bits and robbed Terri of any dignity she had left. I can not say who is right in the situation maybe she wanted to stay alive at all costs and maybe she wanted to be unplugged. The thing is she didn't make her feelings clear either way and that is what started this whole mess. So from this I say make sure you make your wishes in this clear to your family, all sides of them. Make out a living will. Tell your Doctor as well. Take out an ad in the news paper just in case. I don't know what all you can do but whatever you do make your wishes well known to your inner circle. For me I want to be unplugged and now you all know that. I may not know what you want to do and if I have to make the decision with no knowledge of your wishes I will unplug you too. So if that isn't what you want you had better let me know. That is if you are leaving me as the decision maker and well I don't see that happening unless you are my parents or Brad and I already know what they want me to do.

Monday, March 21, 2005

Old Friends

This weekend my very good friend came up from Northern Cal and spent the weekend with us. It was a very nice visit and nice to have a girlfriend around to do girlie things with. The only problem is that she is a night owl and I am a morning person. Ok let me just say I wish I wasn't a morning person but the hours I work force me to be one. I tried to stay up late with her and watch a Sex in the City marathon but 2 episodes in I was asleep on the couch. Then I got up at 8 the next morning and had to hide downstairs until she and Brad finally woke up at 10. It is funny how when people come to visit it is really nice having them, but it is also really nice when they leave. Something about having to entertain people can be so draining especially if you have already worked a long day. Today when I got home she asked what I had planned for us to do. I hadn't planned anything I just wanted to sit down for a little while and rest before I had to take her to the airport tonight and go to Hebrew class afterwards although it was cancelled. But I worked up the energy and we walked over to Target and did some shopping and had manicures. My ring does look even better with manicured hands. We then were going to go have Chinese Food at Thai Klang Dong but after we walked over there we discovered it was closed for some unknown reason. Oh well she could get something at the airport. I had a really good time having her here for the weekend. I also feel good that I got her out walking, even though she hated it. At least now she sees it can be done. Although I don't think she will keep up with it. Oh well I can't convince everyone.

In other news since we did a lot of shopping this weekend I tried on a lot of clothes and the results were conclusive at all the stores. I have gone down a size. It isn't much yet and I can't really see a difference but down a size is definitely a start. My trainer will be so happy tomorrow when I tell her. She will then promptly kick my butt a little harder. I have stayed off caffeine for 2 1/2 weeks now and I am feeling pretty good about it. I meet with the Doctor this week to get a follow up exam. I bought a pedometer today so I will finally know how far I walk a day. I think it will be interesting. We went to the mall this weekend and one of the stores has a very cool thing in it. You go into this booth and this thing spins around the booth and tells the computer your exact measurements. I think I should go in there once a week and get measured to see what the change is from week to week. I will also be able to tell where the weight is coming off first. Like wow this week I lost Butt!! Anyway they have the machine for 8 weeks and I will let you know how it goes. Well I am tired of writing now so I will end this blog for tonight and write more tomorrow. Yes I will be better about writing on a daily bases again.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

The Ides of March

Today is the day Caesar died. There is something so cool about the Ides of March. So the Ides of March have come. I but not yet gone. I think it is important to remember but no one else seems to care. So today if you read this or next 3/15 remember the Ides of March and Hail Caesar. If nothing else you could at least have his salad today. I wonder if the Hotel in Vegas does anything special on the Ides of March?

Who's life is this anyway?

Do you ever have one of those days when something so cool is going on that you sit back and wonder who's life you are living because no way could this be yours? Saturday night was one of those days. On Friday I was listening to the radio at work and they kept talking about Coldplay playing at a small club Friday night and tickets were only 10 bucks. I seriously considering going and buying tickets when they said that you could only purchase 1 ticket and it would be a wrist band not a ticket. As there was no way Brad could meet me to purchase a ticket for himself I gave up the idea. On Saturday Brad went off to work and I stayed home. Everything about the day seemed normal and we had discussed possibly going out with friends later that night. So I texted Brad asking him if he wanted me to makes some calls. He texted me back saying no we already had plans. He then called me a few minutes later and told me that Rob Cohen the director of Stealth had given him 2 tickets to the Coldplay concert Saturday night. I was thrilled and a little confused, who gets $150 a seat tickets for free? I then busied myself trying to figure out proper concert attire, ah yes I am a woman. We then met Brad's coworker, Markus, who had also been given a set of tickets, and went to the concert. As we were walking in we got more and more excited and then they took our tickets and said you can pick up your wrist bands over there. Wrist Bands? We glance over and see the wrist band table and above it were 3 little letters that sent us all into delight, VIP. We all giggled and jumped up and down with excitement. We then picked up our wrist bands and were told this would get us into the after party. Ok heaven was setting in. We then went to see our seats, center orchestra eye level to the stage. Ahh jumbo tron we don't need you tonight. I then turned to Brad and asked if he ever has one of those days when you wonder who's life this is anyway. He nodded and then I said well today I know who's it is Rob Cohen. Brad agreed that it was nice to be Rob. So that has now become a new running joke.

Now on to wedding stuff. Since we got engaged I have become painfully aware of all of those people in my life who I haven't kept track of. The people you think of all the time but never enough to reach out and call them. I started to feel really bad about all those people I have lost. It seems a little selfish to get in touch with them now because I have something to celebrate and not before just to celebrate their friendship. None the less I have made efforts to contact a lot of my old friends and have had surprising results. It would seem that a lot of others carry around the same guilt for not staying in contact and they also have big things to celebrate. It is shocking to see how many people are having babies!!! Anyway I was able to get in touch with an old roommate that I had lost track of, and it was one of those people who when you talk to them after a long time apart it seems as though no time has past. She is so great she has volunteered to do all the girlie shopping stuff and what not that is involved in a wedding. You may also guess that she is pregnant with her first baby. I am so glad to have a friend like her and still a little sad that I have not kept in better touch. So I suppose the point of all this to anyone reading is if you keep meaning to get in touch with someone. Do it already!!!!

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

How are you doing?

So I have notice that a lot of people ask how you are when you are out and about but don't really care about the answer. So I have a theory about giving an unexpected answer when they ask the question. It almost always leads to a longer conversation. When someone asks how I am doing instead of saying the expected answer of fine, I go overboard. "I am fabulous" The person almost always does a double take and then makes a secondary comment. I am sure I could also catch them off guard by being negative but I like the positive a lot more. Today at the grocery store I used the positive response to the guy in the produce aisle. His whole face lit up. I suppose that people are lonely at work and would like some positive interaction. I think that my little test made both of us in better moods.

It looks like work is finally picking up. We have over a thousand dollars in sandwiches going out tomorrow. The owner also sent out all the cookies to perspective clients so I will have a lot of cookie baking to do tomorrow. She has also been spending a great deal of time online researching possible new clients and making calls. Maybe she will make it through after all. She says she is really committed to saving the company and I hope that that is true. All I know for sure right now is that there is enough work at this point for me to work full days on Thursday and Friday of this week and hopefully next week will be a big week. The time off is nice but I would much rather be working. Wow when did that happen that I would much rather be a work then at home. Oh well Brad has the opposite problem as me right now with too much work. I guess someday we will learn to coordinate our schedules better.

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

I love Tuesdays

Tuesdays are such a great day because I leave in the morning and the house is getting kind of messy, I come home in the afternoon and the house is sparkly clean. There is nothing quite like walking in to a clean house. Today was made even better because not only did I come in to a clean house, but UPS had come while Maria was here and she signed for our package so I didn't have to wait a extra day for it. This was no ordinary package though this was special... It is the first gift sent to Brad and me, for our engagement. Beautiful champagne flutes made of crystal with a heart in base. I loved them. Brad got a very funny message from me saying hip hip hurray it is our first package. If I get this excited about the first one I may have to invest in Depends when wedding gifts start coming in. This is so exciting to me. I hope that I remember to enjoy all of this and not get distracted. I realize that this is the only wedding I am going to have and so all of the attention and gifts and planning is a one shot deal. I know it can be really stressful but I hope that throughout this next year I enjoy it. I have been looking forward to this day for my whole life and that I get to marry the man of my dreams, my best friend, and my partner in crime makes it even better. I am also so lucky to have such great friends and family that not only want to see us get married but are as excited as we are to help and to be a part of it. I sometimes wonder what people do without such good people around them, but since Brad and I already have all the best people in the world around us I suppose everyone else in the world has gotten used to playing with the second string. Oh well this is one of the firsts in a long and stimulating process. I hope that you guys my friends will put me in check if I stop enjoying it.

Does anyone wonder what Brad is having for dinner tomorrow night? Well if you were he is having lasagne and vegetables and a Caesar salad. Isn't he lucky? He also gets Cippy's famous garlic bread that is more like a pizza without sauce then garlic bread. Anyway that is what Brad will have for dinner tomorrow, but shhhh don't tell him he doesn't know yet. If you are wondering what I am having dinner tomorrow night all I can say is I haven't even figured out what I am having tonight so your guess is as good as mine. But you can probably guess what I am having for lunch Thursday. Yep it will be Brad's leftovers yum yum. Well I am getting pretty hungry now so I best figure out what to eat for dinner before the munchies take over.

Monday, March 07, 2005

Screwed Again

Ok so it is official, I hate screws. Yesterday when Brad was rotating my tires I noticed that one of my tires had a screw in it. It had not lost any air but since we were putting it on as a front drive tire it was pretty important for me to get it fixed as soon as possible. So today being a Monday I took it down the street to Foogert's Tire. They took my car around and fully patched my tire and not plugged it and had it back to me in under 20 minutes and it only cost me $15. I feel lucky to have such a great tire place down the street. So my Blue Beast is ready to go with 4 nonscrewed tires on it. I find it a little ironic that I keep getting caught off guard by screws.

So I had big plans for today and I was going to skip a day with the walking. My day didn't quite turn out as I had planned. Last night my boss called and once again today there was no work for me. Since I didn't go into work I wasn't there to go to the conference tonight to learn about fruit desserts. So I found myself with a whole day off until my Hebrew class tonight. So I went for a walk today and followed the same route I have walked all weekend which took me about an hour to walk. So I set out and began my walk at 12:55 I walked the route and got stopped several times at lights and had to wait for the walk arrow. I returned home and checked the clock and discovered that it was only 1:35 I somehow knocked about 20 minutes of my walk time. I am not sure how I did that but I must have been hauling butt to cut that much time. I guess I will have to add some side streets into my walk if I want to walk for and hour. When I got home I went to the pool and jumped in and had my first swim of the year. I will give it one word "Brrrrrrrrr" OK so maybe it is a little early to be swimming but it definitely woke me up.

I found something pretty amusing to myself as I walked the last couple of days. I am not a slow walker and I frequently pass other people out for a walk as well. Yesterday there was a young slim couple out walking their dog and you could tell they were trying to exercise as well. The problem was the man was smoking and I didn't want to stay behind them and have to breath his smoke as I was trying to exercise. So I picked up my pace and rushed passed them. I then started to laugh to myself at how humbled these people would be to be passed by a lard ass like me. Granted they probably didn't think about it at all or even really notice, but it made me laugh and push a little harder so it couldn't be bad. The other funny thing that happened today is that as I was walking I was listening to my Ipod Shuffle as I walked and listening to a random assortment of music. A song came on that was the song my trainer walked down the aisle to at her wedding. I had to laugh and start walking a little faster because in my head there she was saying drop those shoulders, try to bring your belly button in to your back, stand up tall and use your posture. Even once in my head I heard you are doing great keep it up. I guess she can find all sorts of ways to get her message across even if it is just a song.

Sunday, March 06, 2005


So today is day three with no caffeine and I have not had even one headache thus far. I decided to not have any caffeine until I felt a headache coming from it and so far so good. I also have been a very good girl with my exercise and I walked for an hour today and yesterday and of course had my trainer come on Friday. It is very warm today so I was going to go swimming today after my walk but sadly the pool is pad locked so I guess that means no pool for me.

The other day Brad asked why it was we no longer gave sacrifices to God and when that stopped. I told him that it stopped when there was no longer a temple. He said why and I said where would they offer them. Of course Brad would not take my word for it and he asked the Rabbi the same question. The Rabbi responded as well that they stopped when we lost the temple. I was so happy I was right. Brad felt a little humbled that I knew more about Jewish practices than he did. I think he forgets that I was a Bible major in college and I do know something about the Torah. Ah well in time Brad will learn not to doubt me.

So there is a down side to exercising so much. I have a huge sore on my right ankle from the shoe rubbing on it. Today I had to stop and pull the heel of my shoe down and walk with it tucked under. My ankle was bleeding pretty bad and it hurt but once it wasn't rubbing anymore I could keep walking. Brad thought it was pretty gross when he saw it. Exercising has also been expensive because not only am I paying for a trainer but as a reward for motivating myself I bought an Ipod Shuffle to listen to when I am out walking. I really like it because not only does it go around my neck, it is nice to not know what song is coming next. For most things I think my regular Ipod is far better but for the purpose of exercise the shuffle is nice to have. Brad joked that I am trying to out gadget him. While I don't think that I am or that it is possible I do have a Shuffle and he doesn't.

Oh well I hope you are all having a great weekend. Brad is in his happy place waxing his car. He has even agreed to rotate my tires. He thought for a minute that he would get out of it because he didn't have a socket that would fit my lugs, however a very helpful neighbor said he did and gave us his. So Brad will rotate my tires after all. So I guess this is my lucky day. Of course seeing him use power tools already makes me a winner. I love a man with a Torque wrench!!!

Thursday, March 03, 2005

Veg Days

So today was one of those days where I really wasn't motivated to do anything. I stayed in bed until 10:30 and then got up went downstairs, and made myself breakfast of oatmeal and an orange. While that may not seem like a big deal for me eating breakfast is a huge deal. I then sat on my but for several more hours watching TV and thinking I should get out and go for a walk. I continued to sit there. I came downstairs a couple of times throughout the day to check my email and to see if anyone responded to my blog, thank you Sandy, and continued to sit on my butt. At 5 I realized I had to get off my butt right then and there or I would not be able to walk while it was still light out. So I ran upstairs and finally got dressed and went for a walk. You know it is amazing how something you dread to do all day can be so enjoyable. I was a bit sorry I didn't go out and do it sooner so I could have walked farther while it was still light. Oh well perhaps now with a trainer I will feel guilty enough to force myself to do the things I enjoy once I am doing them. So now it is 6:30 and I have a ton of energy and not much to use it on. I wish it was a bit warmer out because I would really like to start swimming.

Speaking of my trainer though I had my first session with her on Tuesday and it went great. She pushed me and stretched muscles I forgot existed and since then those muscles are trying to make sure I don't forget them again. I think it is going to be great for me to have a trainer because it keeps me accountable to someone and I feel to guilty letting them down. I suppose the funny part of that is that really I am only letting myself down, but I don't see it that way. It is strange to me how the body works, when you are working out you no longer crave the foods that are bad for you. For me when I am working out regularly not only do I not crave the bad stuff but if for some reason I do and eat it my body rejects it pretty fast and I feel sick. However the opposite for me is not true, watching what I am eating does not make me want to go out and exercise. I start to feel like the lack of my favorite foods is punishment enough and I don't want to have to go out and exercise too. I wonder why that is for me. Anyway for now I am going to focus on getting the regular routine of exercise going and let my body tell me what it wants to eat. The only major thing I am doing with my diet is trying to eat 3 meals a day and only drink 1 caffeinated drink a day. In time I may cut that as well but for now baby steps.

On a very side note I want to say thank you to my future mother in law, it meant a lot to me that you not only commented in my blog but you commented in Brad's blog as "Karin's future Mother in-law" It filled my heart, and I really needed that. So thank you. Brad and I are so lucky to have such wonderful parents.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Buzz Kill

Today I got home and opened the front door to get the mail. As I opened the front door a little fedex sticky fell so I picked it up and it said the package was left on the patio. Curious what package are they speaking of. I didn't order anything and Brad didn't tell me he did either. So I went out onto the patio and retrieved the package. To my delight it was addressed to me! I love packages so I was totally excited to rip it open. I looked at it first to see who it was from but it didn't have a sender on it. So I ripped it open and reached in to see what great surprise someone had sent me. In the package was 2 screws from sears and nothing else. What a buzz kill I didn't even remember the 2 screws were ordered. So once again today I hate Sears, just when you get your hopes up for something great they screw you.

Once again tomorrow we have no orders so I am taking a forced day off. I am so pissed off at the owner right now I can't even talk. I know I need to start looking seriously for a new job but they aren't easy to come by and I still don't have a lot of contacts. The other thing is that I will have a hard time finding something that has weekends off so I can spend time with Brad. I never really thought it would matter to me so much if I had to work weekends but now I realize that the time we have is precious and I would like to make the most of it not lessen it. My boss doesn't want me to look for another job and he said he was going to fight with the owner to get me on salary so that I won't keep losing so much of my paycheck. I don't really see this happening but it is nice to know he wants to fight for my job. So I am feeling a bit alone and sad right now and I really wish my best friends were closer. Sometimes it is hard spending so much time alone and not having trusted girlfriends to talk to face to face. I miss living in the dorms where a friend was always somewhere to be found when you are feeling really low. I miss my mom having hot chocolate with marshmallows and her hugging me and telling me it would be ok. Why can't life be as simple as it was when we were younger. Anyway I am in a bad mood and probally should not be blogging when I am in this kind of mood.

I guess what this post comes down to is that I HATE WEDNESDAYS!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, February 28, 2005

The neighbor cornered me.

I was coming home from Hebrew class and then my meeting with the Rabbi. I was hungry and tired and still needed to talk to my boss as to what time I was working tomorrow when a slightly annoying neighbor caught me and kept me talking outside my garage. Now I am not found of this guy because whenever we are doing things to improve the complex he always throws a fit about it. He tries to ruin it for everyone even when we are getting something great like new garage doors. I don't even know his name and I am pretty sure he doesn't know mine either. So am stuck on the verge of being home but just outside. I make polite small talk and for the second time in one day I am told I have a Jewish soul? I guess it is a good thing I am converting so that my soul will match the rest of me. I found it ok when the Rabbi said it but when a guy I don't even know said it out of the blue it seemed a bit eerie. What does that mean anyway? Is it a compliment or a slur I didn't get? Anyway I had decided I was quite done talking to this guy and I was trying to figure a way out. I was thinking of different scenarios that would get me inside but none seemed the right choice. Just as I was beginning to think was hopelessly trapped my phone began to ring. Oh I have to go that is probably my boss calling. I turned bolted inside grabbed the phone and closed the garage behind me. So thankyou Andrew for saving me from the bore I wasn't interested in talking to, I owe you one.

While I am still not loving Hebrew at least it makes some sense. Once you know the letters you can sound it out. The down side is a lot of the letters look the same and I worry that once my vision starts to go I will no longer see the small differences in the letters. Oh well by then I will have already been bat mitzot.

Sunday, February 27, 2005

The Weather Man Cometh

So it seems as though it has rained every weekend this year. I love the rain so this is not that big of a nuisance to me but after awhile I began to wonder if I was indeed still living in Southern California and not Northern. The weather man has said all week that it will again rain today, Sunday. Well the weather was wrong. You would think since there really isn't that much weather here he could get the little we do have right. This being said I am quite glad the weather man was wrong. Today is beautiful. One of those days you really only get in Southern California. So Brad and I being the nice day lovers we are decided to take a picnic lunch and find some place nice to eat it. We call these little adventures the Brad and Karin Day of Fun! Apparently a lot of other people thought sandwiches were a good idea too because when we got to the deli we were number 57 and they were on 14 so we waited because it goes very fast there. We got our sandwiches and started to leave as they were calling #61 Brad then looked at the ticket to see how far back it was and it was #60 so 100 people were waiting for sandwiches. Crazy huh? So we decided to go South and hit Dockweiler beach and sit on out picnic chairs and have lunch overlooking the ocean. It was beautiful and a good temp. It is also cool because the beach is right near LAX so the whole time you get to watch the planes taking off. It is days like these that make me happy to just be alive and witness the awesomeness of nature. Oh and we bought Pepsi to drink with lunch and both bottles were winners for an itune song. This may or may not been a fluke I will not say.

Last night Brad and I went to a cocktail party at a couple that we met at the synague. We had only met them the week before so they were basically strangers to us and we would know no one else at the party. We went anyway and have now made new friends that are also members of our temple. It is a little odd because I don't know who else would do something like that. The other thing that is odd is that somehow we attract people to us that are as open and laid back as we are. This wouldn't seem as big of deal if we were doing the approaching or inviting but most of the time others approach us. It is kind of cool that we are getting more young couples as friends that we seem to have a lot in common with. It is nice how the network seems to work itself out. I had worried some time back that the older you got the harder it was to make friends. This compounded with old friends moving away or losing touch led me to believe that eventually it would just be me and Brad and whatever little family we eventually make. I guess though that will not be the case for us. New people are coming into our lives and filling the holes left by old departed friends. So as long as we are open to making new friends people will come to be friends. I also think that perhaps this is happening more now than before is due to me. Brad has always been outgoing and willing to make new friends, but I have been intimidated by new people. I guess I never quite felt comfortable with who I was and didn't feel good enough for other people. Something has changed in me though now in that I am not only comfortable with who I am, I am proud of me. I like that I am a pastry chef. I like that I am engaged to the man I always dreamed of. I am happy with where I live and am comfortable with having people see it. Yes there are things I want to change in my life and in our home but I am to the point where I realize that nothing is perfect and it is ok. So now I am willing to be outgoing and start conversations with others or at least hold up my end of it.

Friday, February 25, 2005

The Little Things

I love Costco. I think that the best stuff is there and it makes me happy just being there. I think if I could I would register there. Today I was shown once again just how great they truly are. I always buy my meat from there and when I come home I spend a great deal of time taking the meat out of it's bulk package and vacuum sealing them into small packages. Well someone at Foster Farms figured out the most people are doing the same thing so now a package of chicken breasts comes individually wrapped. Let me say this small thing was a delight to me. I hate spending the time vacuum sealing all the breasts. I even stood there at the chicken counter going "Oh wow this is awesome!!!" People looked at me a little strange. Well screw them it is the little things that make days great. I than found myself so happy about it that I almost bought 2 large packages, but my better senses took over with phrases like frost bite. So instead I bought one and now offer up this, my salute to the fine people at Fosters Farm, keep up the good work, I appreciate your forethought. Now if they can just convince the red meat packer to due the same.

The second thing about Costco is you never know what you will find. I found that I am the weirdest woman in the world. Most people pick the colors for their wedding by knowing their favorite colors, or maybe by picking brides maid dresses. Not me I found pretty ribbon for 6 dollars for 50 feet and said to myself well there you go those are your colors. I then bought 4 rolls of the ribbon so that I can use it for the favors down the road. Now the math on that says even if we have 200 people at the wedding each person can have a yard of ribbon. So I think I got enough. It is hard to know what to buy and how much. I also feel a little crazy buying stuff for a day that is still so far away, but I figure if I buy a little at a time when I see something it may save on stress later down the road. So now due to my Costco purchase I can say my wedding colors will be light blue, light green, and periwinkle. Those of you that know me can say that isn't all that shocking because 2 of those colors are the colors of my kitchen.

On just the random side of things: I love Spring!!!!! I think it is the perfect time of year. The rebirth of everything. The freshness of the air. The weather is perfect, or at least it is here. All the colors are beautiful. To me Spring is perfection. I wonder if in part my feelings on this are because I am a Spring baby? I guess this is also why I so badly wanted my wedding to be in May, because it seems appropriate to start a new life in Spring. I suppose some of you may disagree with me about Spring and find another season better if this is the case than I open up my comment section for you to place your argument for your preferred season. I doubt your argument will change my mind but I would still love to hear it.